Life Lesson #11:
Make peace with your past so it doesn't screw up the present.
I have a strong personal philosophy of no regrets. It's really pretty simple. The decision that you once made for yourself was, at that time, the right decision for you to be making--whether or not it was positive or negative experience or it led to positive or negative consequences. I'm not sitting here and saying that making personal destructive decisions (such as drugs) are okay, because they aren't, especially if they cause you to spiral out of control. But even those that have come out of a spiral of drugs and bad decisions will tell you that they learned something from all those poor decisions. Those that have truly overcome their ghosts will tell you that you just have to put one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward. It's a good way to live your life. Moving forward. One step at a time. One day at a time.
Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. And today? Today is a gift. That’s why we call it the present.
Anyway, back to the choices and decisions being right for you at the time. Think about it. If you didn't make the choices that you made way back when (whenever that is, yesterday? Last week? Last year? 10 years ago?), where would you be right now? Would you be right where you are right now? You are a little bit of a different person for each choice you've made. Yes, we've all made poor decisions. We've all regretted making these decisions at the time, but what did you learn from that decision, experience, act? That is what matters. Take it as a learning experience and move on. You can't truly live in the present if you are always stuck in your past wondering 'what if'. You can't truly move forward in your future if you are stuck in the past.
One thing that I really regret (there goes that no regret philosophy), is credit cards. Unfortunately, I had to learn the hard way about them. Paying them back, what a pain it is, how damaging it can be. Here's the kicker. As much as I hate paying my credit cards back and paying for things that I bought 4+ years ago (Jake and I haven't used a credit card in 4+ years!!), there are more charges on the credit cards from things we needed at the time--groceries, to pay a bill, school books, etc. I do admit to my New York & Co. and Victoria Secret's credit cards (dumb, dumb, dumb!), but those have been paid off for at least 2 years and I will never again get a store credit card. And I've learned that if I can't afford it, I can't have it. I've learned how to value what we do have and what we are able to save up and get rather than living life having everything I want. I learned how to value things. And I learned how to properly use a credit card.
How did you come to terms with your past? What helped you find peace in your life?